Remembering a distant past

Reunion of the Romblon High School Batch '61 in April 2011
at the house of Benita Reyes in Sawang, Romblon, Romblon

A set of reunion pictures sent to me by a high school classmate revived not only my memories of the past but also the question about life's meaning that I have been grappling with since I was in college. We belong to Batch '61 of the Romblon High School in a small town called Romblon in the heart of the Philippines. That means that we are now more than 60 years old.
The first time I looked at the pictures, I could hardly recognize most of my former classmates. I had to compare notes - by email - with another classmate, Jim Marquez, who is now in the US. Since both of us were not at the reunion, we made a little guesswork and agreed on Napoleon Lim, our salutatorian we fondly called by his nickname Dandette.
Dandette, who could have been the dream boy of many girls because he was not only brainy but also handsome, was a son of a prosperous businessmen in Romblon, a small town in a province after which the town was named. So it did not come as a surprise to me that he became an engineer. What I heard of him was that he became an executive of a multinational oil company with offices in Manila.
The women in the pictures, most of whom were pretty when we were young, still have traces of their youthful glory. But the ravages of time have undeniably taken their toll. It is futile to deny that time, reputed to be a great healer, is a lousy beautician. I have always remained young at heart but the pictures reminded me that we are now in the twilight years of our lives.
I remember having surreptitiously inserted love letters in the books of some of the girls with whom I had a crush. The letters were signed Doveglion, the pen name of the famous Filipino poet Jose Garcia Villa. I did not have the courage to sign my own name on the letters not because I did not like the name with which I was christened but because I was so dark and ... well, neither tall nor handsome.

A farmhand, I was shy then, a loner who would melt under the spotlight. I remember having just two close friends in our class - Rolando Mingoa, who lived in a farming village next to one where I lived, and Victor Lagman, whose family came from Davao del Norte down south.
The dictum that birds of the same feather flock together applied to the three of us. Rolando, nicknamed Lando, and Victor, who was Vic to those who knew him, were not social mixers as well.
I have a fond memory of Vic - my seat mate in fourth year - during a quiz in Literature. Sensing perhaps that I hadn't studied the previous night, he left his answers wide open and told me to copy. "No, thanks," I declined.

The administration building of the Romblon National High School,
formerly Romblon High School, and part of the marble grandstand.

We never talked about the incident after the test, which I passed with just a little above the borderline grade, but I knew that I had gained his respect. We often sat together at the marble grandstand during PE watching other students playing on the ground - with a few moments of conversations once in a while. It was friendship that thrived even in silence.
Lando came from a village called Agnipa, about two kilometers from Ginablan where my sister and I lived with the family of my uncle after my father died in Bacolod City where I was born. Lando and I both dreamed of going to college, although we knew how enormous were the challenges before us, particularly because there was no college in Romblon, Romblon, then.
Lando's family had a tract of land whose produce wasn't enough to send him to college in Manila or in any other city. He wanted to become an engineer and so did I. Despite the odds, we kept on dreaming and believing in the saying that, "if there's a will, there's a way." After graduation, Lando left for Manila. I went to Bacolod, which I was familiar with, a year later. My journey to Bacolod later took me to Batangas and Manila a few years thereafter.

The athletic field and one of the two wooden grandstands.

I agree with people who say that the best time in our lives was our high school days. Those were the days when we started dreaming of our future and did not have much cares for the here and now. I recall the dying days of our senior year when we were asked by some of our classmates to write in their slum books on what we wanted to be and other personal circumstances.
I remember that apart from my dream to become an engineer, I added an entry that I wanted to own a ranch. That entry caught the attention of a classmate, Arturo Fabellon, who kidded me that I could easily fulfill that dream if I would settle for a ranch with only one or two cows. I did not mind him. Youth was a time for both dreams and fantasies.
Most of our classmates became what they wanted to be. Dandette became an engineer. Senia Galindez became a teacher and so did Vilma Muleta,Yolanda Mindo, Melba de Joya, Arturo Fabellon and Wilmo Fallar. Jim Marquez became an architect and Vicky Uy a nurse. I haven't heard on what happened to Ruben Famorcan, our valedictorian, and had lost contact with Lando and Vic.
There were more than 50 of us in Batch '61 and it isn't possible to keep track of each of us. In the pictures sent to me by Benita Reyes, who has settled in a village called Sawang after working in London, I did not see Ronaldo Platon, who was among the popular guys in our batch, Louie Morente, whom I courted quietly, and Leny Capa, who was so demure you could put her on a pedestal.
I did not become an engineer and that's a long story that may take a book to write. But in a nutshell, I realized when I was working on my way to college - first as a construction laborer and later as a security guard - that an engineering course was too expensive for me to pursue. That convinced me that our fate is not always in our hands, no matter if Shakespeare tells us that our destiny is not written in the stars.

My destiny was written in the stars since I started to develop a passion for writing when I was in high school.  Although I was just an above-average student in my academic subjects, I was getting very high grades in formal themes. Knowing my passion for writing, a friend advised me to take journalism when I was about to enroll at the Lyceum of the Philippines in Manila later.
Let me take a little ego trip.
In high school, I remember that one of our English teachers, Mrs. Amelia Festin, once called me to the teachers' room. With my formal-theme writings on her desk, she told me I had a knack for writing and advised me to keep the writing torch burning. Another English teacher, Miss Milagros Mayor, a distant relative who became Mrs. Gutierrez, had asked me once to take the entry exams for staff members of The Marble, the school paper. Dreading competition, I did not take the tests.
I dreaded competition in high school. That was why I always wanted to be in Section 2. But in fourth year, I wasn't allowed to go back to my home section where I was king.
There were two important lessons I learned in life. First, we have to dream. That's the same advice the fairy tale Cinderella gives us. Second, we have to learn how to  appreciate whatever blessings that come our way. Life will lose its meaning if we do not enjoy it. But enjoying life does not necessarily mean going to parties or outings. You can enjoy life even in silence.
In the twilight years of our lives, I am reminded of the famous Shakespearean line that life is "a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury signifying nothing". The Book of Ecclesiastes in the Bible has another version for that - all our worldly endeavors are just like chasing the winds.
Having said that, let me leave a small reminder to close this article. In life's dying embers, may we realize that however we highly think of ourselves we are no more than pilgrims in this world and that our lives are just fleeting shadows of our dreams and passions.




Please visit my other blogs Miscelleous at http://www.miscellaneous-oddnews.blogspot.com, Viajero at http://www.viajero-funtravel.blogspot.com and Fun in Life at http://www.salt-funstories.blogspot.com.


To my classmates. You may want to read my book "The Gypsy Soul and Other Essays" which is available at amazon.com and Barnes and Noble. The book image is on the top-left side of this blog. Just click the image, it will direct you to amazon.com.
I extend the same invitation to other readers.
I hope I could launch another book next year, That's a dream.
Have a nice day.

Catholics, Muslims pursue dialogue amid Mideast tension

* Catholic-Muslim Forum debates role of reason in religion
* Meeting shows progress since pope sparked protests in 2006
* Disagreements persist but are debated openly

By Tom Heneghan
Religion Editor

BETHANY BEYOND THE JORDAN, Jordan, Nov 25 (Reuters) - Only five years ago, critical remarks by Pope Benedict about Islam sparked off violent protests in several Muslim countries.
Never very good, relations between the world's two largest religions sank to new lows in modern times.
This week, while protesters in the Arab world were demanding democracy and civil rights, Catholics and Muslims met along the Jordan River for frank and friendly talks about their differences and how to get beyond their misunderstandings.
The Catholic-Muslim Forum, which grew out of the tensions following Benedict's speech in the German city of Regensburg, was overshadowed by events in Egypt, Yemen and Syria. The lack of any dramatic news here reflected the progress the two sides have made since 2006.
"We have passed from formal dialogue to a dialogue between friends," Cardinal Jean-Louis Tauran, head of the Vatican's department for interfaith dialogue, said at the conference held near the Jordan River site believed to be where Jesus was baptised. "We realised that we have a common heritage,"
Recalling the strains that prompted Muslims to suggest a dialogue in 2007, Jordan's Prince Ghazi bin Muhammad bin Talal said: "Since then, despite some misunderstandings, I dare say the general Muslim-Catholic ambiance has ameliorated considerably."
The 24 Catholic and 24 Muslim religious leaders, scholars and educators meeting here debated how each religion uses reason to strengthen insight into its beliefs. Roman Catholicism has long argued that faith without reason can breed superstition while nihilism can emerge from reason without faith.

POPE'S ILL-FATED SPEECH

This was the core message of Benedict's Regensburg speech, but it was drowned out when he quoted a 14th century Byzantine emperor describing Islam as violent and irrational. Radical Islamists responded with violent protests.
After he expressed his regrets, 38 Muslim scholars wrote to the pope suggesting a meeting to discuss misreading of Islam they found in his text.
Benedict, who had long thought interfaith dialogue could blur differences between religions, did not reply. He believed discussing theology was all but impossible because they do not analyse the Koran as Christians and Jews do their scriptures.
A year later, 138 Muslim scholars issued a broader appeal to all Christian churches to discuss the commands of love of God and neighbour that both faiths shared. Led by Prince Ghazi, the group included several grand muftis as well as leading Islamic intellectuals from around the Muslim world.
This time, the Vatican reluctantly agreed and hosted the first Catholic-Muslim Forum in November 2008 in Rome.
That meeting was a watershed, allowing Catholics and Muslims to discuss theology seriously instead of simply holding a polite meeting ending with pious calls for peace and understanding.
Although he only met the Muslims at a formal session in the Vatican, Benedict was a quick learner. By May 2009, when he visited Jordan, Israel and the Palestinian territories, the pope echoed their arguments and eased the quest for common ground.

COMMON SENSE OF URGENCY

Three years after the introductory session, the second Forum on Nov 21-23 focused on the relationship between faith and reason.
Ibrahim Kalin, a Turkish philosopher who is now chief policy advisor to Turkish Prime Minister Tayyip Erdogan, explained how Islam also argues that faith must be tempered by reason.
In the main Catholic presentation, Italian philosopher Vittorio Possenti explained how Catholic teaching stresses the intrinsic value and natural rights of every human being.
"There's a common sense of the urgency and importance of this meeting, even though the context and background we're coming from are quite different," said Archbishop Kevin McDonald, the top Catholic official for interfaith dialogue in England and Wales.
The Arab Spring uprisings this year have changed the context, especially by allowing Islamist parties to operate more freely in Tunisia, Egypt and Libya.
This has also opened the door to the Salafists, radical Islamists who have attacked Egypt's Coptic Christian minority and spread fear among Christians across the Middle East,

FAITH AND THE ARAB SPRING

Aref Ali Nayed, a Libyan theologian who joined his country's revolutionaries and is now Tripoli's ambassador in the United Arab Emirates, said the role of faith in the emerging political systems highlighted the need for reasonable religion to prevail.
"It is extremely important that the massive movements we are experiencing today do not happen at the level of irrationality or mere emotion," he said.
"Such movements must be guided by the light of faith, but reasoned faith that encourages thinking and dialogue."
Strains emerged at some of the closed-door talks, especially on the issue of whether Muslims can convert to Christianity.
One Catholic noted the Church could not accept any converts in the Gulf countries but Christian foreign workers there who switched to Islam got a warm public welcome to their new faith.
Another asked why Muslims would not respect the choice made by people who sincerely wanted to convert despite all the problems they knew would come. In response, a Muslim said Islamic countries remained wary because too many conversions were forced in the past.
Some Muslims also expressed difficulty in understanding how the Catholic Church could open dialogue with other faiths after its Second Vatican Council in the 1960s after avoiding it for almost two millennia before that.
They also suggested the Catholics had given in too much to modern secularism and not protested enough against depictions of Jesus that Muslims considered blasphemous.
Still, the strength of their current ties showed when, during a break on the final day, delegates swapped jokes about religion. Bosnia's Chief Mufti Mustafa Ceric turned out to be group's stand-up comedian.
"Did you hear about the preacher and taxi driver?" the Sarajevo-based cleric asked. "When they died and came before God, He sent the preacher to hell and the taxi driver to heaven.
"When the preacher asked why, God said 'When you preached, you put people to sleep. But he used to drive his taxi so fast that he made all his passengers pray for eternal salvation'."

Ten principles for peace of mind

1. Do Not Interfere In Others' Business Unless Asked:
Most of us create our own problems by interfering too often in others' affairs. We do so because somehow we have convinced ourselves that our way is the best way, our logic is the perfect logic and those who do not conform to our thinking must be criticized and steered to the right direction, our direction. This thinking denies the existence of individuality and consequently the existence of God. God has created each one of us in a unique way. No two human beings can think or act in exactly the same way. All men or women act the way they do because God within them prompts them that way. Mind your own business and you will keep your peace.

2. Forgive And Forget:
This is the most powerful aid to peace of mind. We often develop ill feelings inside our heart for the person who insults us or harms us. We nurture grievances. This in turn results in loss of sleep, development of stomach ulcers, and high blood pressure. This insult or injury was done once, but nourishing of grievance goes on forever by constantly remembering it. Get over this bad habit. Life is too short to waste in such trifles. Forgive, Forget, and march on. Love flourishes in giving and forgiving.

3. Do Not Crave For Recognition:
This world is full of selfish people. They seldom praise anybody without selfish motives. They may praise you today because you are in power, but no sooner than you are powerless, they will forget your achievement and will start finding faults in you. Why do you wish to kill yours in striving for their recognition? Their recognition is not worth the aggravation. Do your duties ethically and sincerely.

4. Do Not Be Jealous:
We all have experienced how jealousy can disturb our peace of mind. You know that you work harder than your colleagues in the office, but sometimes they get promotions; you do not. You started a business several years ago, but you are not as successful as your neighbor whose business is only one year old. There are several examples like these in everyday life. Should you be jealous? No. Remember everybody's life is shaped by his/her destiny, which has now become his/her reality. If you are destined to be rich, nothing in the world can stop you. If you are not so destined, no one can help you either. Nothing will be gained by blaming others for your misfortune. Jealousy will not get you anywhere; it will only take away your peace of mind.

5. Change Yourself According To The Environment:
If you try to change the environment single-handedly, the chances are you will fail. Instead, change yourself to suit your environment. As you do this, even the environment, which has been unfriendly to you, will mysteriously change and seem congenial and harmonious.

6. Endure What Cannot Be Cured:
This is the best way to turn a disadvantage into an advantage. Every day we face numerous inconveniences, ailments, irritations, and accidents that are beyond our control. If we cannot control them or change them, we must learn to put up with these things. We must learn to endure them cheerfully. Believe in yourself and you will gain in terms of patience, inner strength and will power.

7. Do Not Bite Off More Than You Can Chew:
This maxim needs to be remembered constantly. We often tend to take more responsibilities than we are capable of carrying out. This is done to satisfy our ego. Know your limitations. . Why take on additional loads that may create more worries? You cannot gain peace of mind by expanding your external activities. Reduce your material engagements and spend time in prayer, introspection and meditation. This will reduce those thoughts in your mind that make you restless. Uncluttered mind will produce greater peace of mind.

8. Meditate Regularly:
Meditation calms the mind and gets rid of disturbing thoughts. This is the highest state of peace of mind. Try and experience it yourself. If you meditate earnestly for half an hour everyday, your mind will tend to become peaceful during the remaining twenty-three and half-hours. Your mind will not be easily disturbed as it was before. You would benefit by gradually increasing the period of daily meditation. You may think that this will interfere with your daily work. On the contrary, this will increase your efficiency and you will be able to produce better results in less time.

9. Never Leave The Mind Vacant:
An empty mind is the devil's workshop. All evil actions start in the vacant mind. Keep your mind occupied in something positive, something worthwhile. Actively follow a hobby. Do something that holds your interest. You must decide what you value more: money or peace of mind. Your hobby, like social work or religious work, may not always earn you more money, but you will have a sense of fulfillment and achievement. Even when you are resting physically, occupy yourself in healthy reading or mental chanting of God's name.

10. Do Not Procrastinate And Never Regret:
Do not waste time in protracted wondering “should I or shouldn't I?” Days, weeks, months, and years may be wasted in that futile mental debating. You can never plan enough because you can never anticipate all future happenings. Value your time and do the things that need to be done. It does not matter if you fail the first time. You can learn from your mistakes and succeed the next time. Sitting back and worrying will lead to nothing. Learn from your mistakes, but do not brood over the past. DO NOT REGRET. Whatever happened was destined to happen only that way. Why cry over spilt milk?

"Spread Love everywhere you go. Let no one come to you without leaving happier "
Mother Teresa

Lifted from the blog of Masterwordsmith.

Profoundly Beautiful...

This is written by Masterwordsmith and I took the liberty of lifting it from her blog. It jibes with my usual theme about our hurried lives. The essay is very touching, I am sure you will like reading it. Have a nice day.


Too many people put off something that brings them joy just because they haven't thought about it, don't have it on their schedule, didn't know it was coming or are too rigid to depart from their routine.


I got to thinking one day about all those people on the Titanic who passed up dessert at dinner that fateful night in an effort to cut back. From then on, I've tried to be a little more flexible. 


How many women out there will eat at home because their husband didn't suggest going out to dinner until after something had been thawed? Does the word 'refrigeration' mean nothing to you? 


How often have your kids dropped in to talk and sat in silence while you watched 'Jeopardy' on television? 


I cannot count the times I called my sister and said , 'How about going to lunch in a half hour?' She would gas up and stammer, 'I can't. I have clothes on the line. My hair is dirty. I wish I had known yesterday, I had a late breakfast, It looks like rain' And my personal favorite: 'It's Monday.' She died a few years ago. We never did have lunch together. 


Because people cram so much into their lives, we tend to schedule our headaches.. We live on a sparse diet of promises we make to ourselves when all the conditions are perfect! 


We'll go back and visit the grandparents when we get Steve toilet-trained. We'll entertain when we replace the living-room carpet. We'll go on a second honeymoon when we get two more kids out of college. 


Life has a way of accelerating as we get older. The days get shorter, and the list of promises to ourselves gets longer. One morning, we awaken, and all we have to show for our lives is a litany of 'I'm going to,' 'I plan on,' and 'Someday, when things are settled down a bit.' 


When anyone calls my 'seize the moment' friend, she is open to adventure and available for trips. She keeps an open mind on new ideas. Her enthusiasm for life is contagious. You talk with her for five minutes, and you're ready to trade your bad feet for a pair of Rollerblades and skip an elevator for a bungee cord. 


My lips have not touched ice cream in 10 years. I love ice cream.. It's just that I might as well apply it directly to my stomach with a spatula and eliminate the digestive process. The other day, I stopped the car and bought a triple-decker. If my car had hit an iceberg on the way home, I would have died happy. 


Now... go on and have a nice day. Do something you WANT to... not something on your SHOULD DO list. If you were going to die soon and had only one phone call you could make, who would you call and what would you say? And why are you waiting? 


Make sure you read this to the end; you will understand why I sent this to you. 


Have you ever watched kids playing on a merry go round
or listened to the rain lapping on the ground?
Ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight
or gazed at the sun into the fading night?
Do you run through each day on the fly?
When you ask 'How are you?' Do you hear the reply?
When the day is done, do you lie in your bed
with the next hundred chores running through your head?
Ever told your child, 'We'll do it tomorrow.'
And in your haste, not see his sorrow?
Ever lost touch? Let a good friendship die?
Just call to say 'Hi'?


When you worry and hurry through your day,
it is like an unopened gift thrown away.
Life is not a race. Take it slower.
Hear the music before the song is over.


'Life may not be the party we hoped for... but while we are here we might as well dance.' 


-Author Unknown-












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Be thankful in life

Heavy rains remind us of challenges in life. Do not ask for a lighter rain. Pray for a good umbrella. That is attitude.


When flood comes, fish eat ants and when flood recedes, ants eat fish. Only time matters. Just hold on, God gives opportunity to everyone!


Life is not about finding the right person, but creating the right relationship, it's not how we care in the beginning, but how much we care till the end.


Some people may throw stones in your path. It depends on what you make with them. A wall or a bridge? Remember you are the architect of your life.


Search for a beautiful heart, not for a beautiful face. Beautiful things are not always good, but good things are always beautiful.


It’s not important to hold all the good cards in life. But it’s important how well you play with the cards you hold.


Often when we lose  hope and think this is the end, God smiles and says, "relax dear it’s just a bend, not the end." Have faith.


One of the basic differences between God and humans is, God gives, gives and forgives. But human gets, gets, gets and forgets.


Be thankful in life....


Adopted from the blog of Masterwordsmithm